“Where am I?”

       I have always had a final destination in mind, an ideal that I know no matter what, I will achieve it; and this period of my life is a part of the way, a part that will bring me closer to my goal.
       I feel like I have come a long way and still, it feels like this is just the beginning; this year at Westminster Kingsway, in London, has offered me a new perspective of life. I was able to constantly compare the place where I am to the place where I come from, starting with the people and their way of living and finishing with the geographic zone, which contributes so much to the difference I was writing about. I felt happy, I felt sad and then I felt everything at once.
       I am planning on finishing the college and go to a drama school, here in London or in America. I have done some research about the possibilities I am interested in, but the decision hasn’t been made yet. There are a lot of aspects to consider and the most important one of them is the financial support needed for the drama school. In this case, Britain has more offers and solutions to handle the problem; meanwhile, America wouldn’t be so helpful with paying the drama school’s tuition fees, as I will be an international student, not an American citizen.


                     “What skills do I posses and how have I developed these?”

       One thing that I’ve always had and that probably made it easier for me to act is empathy, which allowed me to transpose myself into the mind of the others, see the way they think, how they feel or how they see me. It is like a trip in other’s minds. But one thing I, also, had was shyness, the bad kind, the one that doesn’t allow you to be yourself when someone’s watching. Now, I can say I managed to work on that and diminish it, but there is still some that comes up in moments when I don’t expect it. Looking back on my my reviews and feedbacks from my tutors (“Your performance was engaged and focused at all times, listening and reacting well” - Greek Theatre; “Your focus and engagement in the moment was very strong, well done” - Chekov work) and on my personal reflection, there are a lot of skills I have developed, skills that don’t help me only on acting, but on my personal life as well; confidence - being alone on the stage or only with a partner has pushed to step up and take control on what I was doing and how I was feeling performing and that’s when I became aware of the power that I’ve got; focus - this one is a part of my process to combat shyness, as to be focused involved not minding the dozens of pairs of eyes staring at me, observing my every move; physicality - I observed an improvement in the way I use my body on the stage, like my moves are more connected to my thoughts and every move is justified and has a purpose; space awareness - I’ve learned not to be afraid of the “infinite” stage that before the performance didn’t seem that big and connect myself with the surroundings, own the stage, not let it own me; thought - sometimes clearing my thoughts was the hardest thing, as emotions, worries and my character’s thoughts were dancing around in a Brownian motion, still, I managed to focus on the things I could control (my performance) and let the things I couldn’t control just happen.
         The most recent feedback I have received from Rob, which is “Monologue was very strong and the thought processes were excellent. Very much in the moment  and in tune with the the situation the character finds themselves, Careful with the articulation, ‘which is more the vowel sounds but we can work on that .” is a summary of my actual situation, as the subtext seems to be my strongest point and articulation needs to be worked on. The monologue I chose was Lue, from “The winterling” written by Jez Bitterworth, but I prefer not to call it a performance, as I didn’t manage to perform the whole monologue in front of an audience,

“Next steps? What do I plan to do beyond this course and how will I aim to achieve this?”

        I have already had the chance to be a part of some wonderful projects, as Camden Youth Theatre - we have put on a show for two weekends at Camden People’s Theatre and it was quite an experience for me, it was the first time I was an actor in an official show. Broken Hearted Youth Theatre gave us some great workshops and casted some of us to feature in a short film. For a week (1st - 7th July) I will be going to Insights Summer School 2019 at London College of Communication and I can’t wait to see how it is going to be. My point is: I have been doing little, but significant things to get myself ready and this is how I aim to achieve my goal. Besides going to a drama school, I intend to keep myself implied in all sort of projects and activities and to create connections with people from the industry.
        My next step is to get ready for the drama school, working on my application and on my acting. I am looking for new monologues for both the next year of college and auditions that will come my way. I will keep looking for talent agencies or websites (as Backstage) that allow me to find castings and gain experience, as I have had some projects coming from here.